How Can I Deal with Someone Who Is Angry or Bitter
The heart knows its own bitterness, and a stranger does not share its joy. Proverbs 14:10
Each day we encounter people who are full of anger and bitterness. A bitter person is someone who has been hurt, has let that hurt fester within, and consequently hurt others. Maybe the bitter person you will encounter will be a friend, and stranger, a coworker, a fellow church member, a family member, or perhaps even your spouse.
How can you deal with someone who is angry and bitter? God’s counsel is Ephesians 4:32 applies here: “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.” Kindness toward someone who is angry is a Christlike attitude – He responded to cursing with blessing. Being tenderhearted means being moved with the compassion of Christ toward the bitter person. Tenderheartedness is praying Christ’s prayer from the Cross, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do” (Luke 23:24). Forgiving an angry person means that you do not hold their sin against them. The only basis for these supernatural attitudes and actions is the supernatural grace of God found in Christ alone. You can only forgive bitter and angry people on the basis of God’s forgiveness of you in Christ.
When someone who is angry and bitter offends you, you have two options: you can either respond the way you naturally would, with revenge, or respond the way Christ in you would, with forgiveness.*
Father God, many times I ask, “How many times shall I forgive one who sins against me?” And I can hear Your Son say, “Up to seventy times seven” (Matthew 18:22) I realize that this is not a matter of mere multiplication; it is a matter of the attitude of my heart. I pray that You would supernaturally enable me by Your Spirit to be kind to those who are rude to me, tenderhearted to those who are angry at me, and forgiving to those who have wronged me. I pray in Jesus’s name. Amen.
*Dr. Michael Lewis, Plant City, Florida